A rainbow is supposed to be a symbol of hope, not necessarily of good weather! I am reading a book at the moment entitled  “The Better Angels of our Nature” by a well-known psychologist called Steven Pinker. This is about how violence in civilised societies has decreased over the last few centuries, especially since the 1990s. Some may find this surprising, particularly since a soldier was attacked and killed on the streets of London by fundamentalist Muslims only last week. However Pinker’s statistics are convincing and his arguments robust. Therefore we do have reasons to be hopeful about the future for our children.

I heard recently that a young student in Southampton committed suicide as a result of not being able to cope with IBS. The sad thing is that a health psychologist would have probably been able to help her. IBS is a classic example of how the body and mind sometimes don’t work together in an ideal manner. A friend of mine who studied this for her PhD found that a CBT intervention worked very well with people living with IBS. Unfortunately GPs do not refer to health psychologists; and there are still very few health psychologists working within the NHS. So we either work in academia and/or privately. A student probably wouldn’t be able to afford £40 a week, but her parents may have done…

It was my birthday in March and I noticed that there were a lot of other birthdays in March too, amongst my family and friends; this got me thinking back to something said on “thought for the day” about how it can bolster our self-esteem, if we are told a good story about our birth. As I was born in the 60s and I was the eldest I was born in a maternity home, probably not too dissimilar from the one in “Call the Midwife” – except there were cockroaches on the floor and my mother had to keep her slippers on the bed! My father was not allowed to be there and if I had been a boy I would have been called Christopher, but was instead named after my father Jack. Then when my parents took me home the dog thought I was one of her puppies. I could tell similar stories about my children’s births. If your parents are still alive why not ask them about yours?

If you’re anything like me you won’t be enjoying this time of year -it’s cold, clothes are tight and money’s tight! Or maybe you enjoy skiing or snowboarding? Spring seems a long way off but the days are gradually getting longer. Give yourself something to look forward to, but also find comfort in getting back to a normal routine and a healthy diet. The Psychologist this month is a special issue on individual differences – we’re all different in the way we look and the way we behave – thank goodness – who would want to live in a world of stepford wives?

So Christmas is almost upon us and it can be a stressful time of year, but my tips for enjoying it and feeling less stressed are to remember:

• Christmas dinner is just a roast
• The only decorations that matter are the ones on the Christmas tree!
• Presents don’t have to be perfect
• It’s a time to spend with those you care about
• It’s a celebration of the birth of baby Jesus

Also as a wise person once said “Don’t wast energy trying to empty your life of worrying things, when you could be filling your life with wholesome things”

I love the Autumn -but some people get SAD (seasonal affective disorder) at this time of year – so make the most of it when the sun does shine – even if it’s just popping out in your lunch break. The cold weather can make it more difficult for those with joint pain – so it’s good to wrap up warm with chunky knits and cosy boots. A visiting patient said the other day that she thinks of pain as an ugly picture in the room which she doesn’t like but doesn’t look at even though she knows its there – do you think this is helpful? 

In the November Psychologist magazine I read an interesting article on PTG (post-traumatic growth) which I thought I would share – especially as I have had a car crash recently – a bit like that cheesy song “What doesn’t kill  you (stronger)” by Kelly Clarkson: “What is post-traumatic growth? After experiencing a traumatic event people often report 3 ways in which their psychological functioning increases: 

1. Relationships are enhanced in some ways e.g. people describe that they come to value friends and family more and an increased sense of compassion for others.
2. People change their views of themselves e.g. developing wisdom, strength and gratitude, perhaps coupled with a greater acceptance of their limitations.
3. People describe changes in their life philosophy e.g. finding a fresh appreciation for each new day, becoming less materialistic and more able to live in the present. (Joseph 2012).”

Nature reflects this too – she dies in the Autumn and Winter and then comes to life again in the following Spring.